Life's Little Details: Knitting, Sewing, Green Living, Frugal Living and Cooking In A Little Corner of Southern French Countryside.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Post-Partum Recession

It's really not Post-Partum Depression - at least not for me. It's more like a little recession, you know? Don't worry, Tom Cruise, I'm not so low that I'll need medical intervention. I got to tell you, though, that after a 9-month hormone high, I've been dropped, and I may be in some sort of mild withdrawal. I've had hot flashes and sweet cravings for weeks now, but recent family visits had apparently postponed the emotional stuff. Until this week, anyway. One minute, I'm holding my sweet newborn in my arms and could cry from the happy-happy-joy-joy of it all. The next, I could cry for some unexplanable feeling of loneliness or something else I can't quite put my finger on (there's nothing quite like feeling like you need to cry but not allowing the tears to come, because you lack a good reason - is it reasonable to cry about your most recent haircut, which sounded like a good idea at the time, but somehow makes you feel even less feminine than before?).

At least I know it's not severe. And, I know it's normal, so I'm not freaked out by it. I've experienced it before, and it didn't last forever. I remember crying on my birthday just after Lambchop #1 was born. Why? Not because I was growing older. In fact, I cried because my husband bought me flowers. And, it wasn't because I was so moved by the rare floral gesture on his part. It was because when I saw the flowers, it occurred to me for the first time that it was actually my birthday. Realizing that I was so overwhelmed by this new person in my life that I could forget my own birthday shocked me.

So, here we are more than five years later, and the emotional ups and downs are back. There are no birthdays to forget, at least. But, you know, a birthday wouldn't be so bad, because it'd be a great excuse for a cake, which is exactly what I'd like (but am avoiding) right now. I have been trying to lay off the sweets this past week and didn't purchase or make anything that I shouldn't have. Where does that leave me this Sunday afternoon, though? In a house empty of tempting tasties and no open stores in the vicinity. Maybe I should call up Tom and see how he would suggest I deal with the problem. What do you think?